We Might Actually Pull This Off

Back when Blog first proposed the idea of going the entirety of May without dropping below 1000+ hits, I thought it was out of its processors. We've had some pretty incredible runs here at Writing About Writing, but the hits always eventually dip below 1000.

But it's starting to look like Blog may have called this one. We've made a few days only by eight or nine views, but so far we've done it.

Blog is dancing in the street (and reminding me to get back to work). I am actually just shaking my head in disbelief.

The Mailbox: Copyright and Editing

When should a writer worry about editing? Shouldn't editing be an editor's job? What's the best way to copyright work?

[Remember, keep sending in your questions to chris.brecheen@gmail.com with the subject line "W.A.W. Mailbox" and I will answer each Friday.  I will use your first name ONLY unless you tell me explicitly that you'd like me to use your full name or you would prefer to remain anonymous.  My comment policy also may mean one of your comments ends up in the mailbox. And beware that I might not always agree with you.] 


Steven's questions:

When should the writer really worry about editing and grammar? Editing is for Editors, writing is for writers; they should be separate entities, don't you think?

Writers are supposed to worry just about writing; grammar and rewrites, that's what editors are supposed to do, agreed? Writers should be concerned about grammar a LITTLE but Editors do all the nuance grammatical work otherwise, what use are they right?

What is the best way to copyright your work? I'm kind of new at this as I want to copyright my work before I send it out to a publisher. I'm almost ready to sent out my manuscrip (mss.). [sic]

My reply(s):

Note: Steven actually sent me three different questions through Facebook, and I'm going to answer them all. Because I like a little three on one action, if you know what I mean.

Steven, I hope you like the memes and bad puns over there on my Facebook page because you're not going to like my answer today. I'm probably the most outspoken proponent that a writer has to be more than just a grammar codex, and how obnoxious prescriptivism is, but even I know how important it is to the clarity of written communication. You've given me one of those "Sort of...but...." questions.

Like if I came up to you and said "Awesome news! I just met this girl who asked me to marry her after only an hour. That means she's really into me and not afraid of commitment right?" My answer would be: "Sort of, but....." And then I would tell you to run faster than you had ever run from anyone in your life. I might even tell you to change your last name, let your hair grow out and spell your name Stephen while you work at a beach bar in Guam for a few years.

That's just about how not-completely-true your sentiments about editors and writers are right now.

In theory, if you had an editor on retainer who could just walk around behind you everywhere you go and fix your writing, you would never need to really learn grammar. I'm guessing that would get prohibitively expensive for most of us though–especially if they don't do windows while you're watching The L Word and not really writing. They would have to have a British accent though, and say "Very good, sir," every time you gave them something to edit.

"Begging your pardon, Sir, but this Facebook status picture
of your lunch does appear to employ the wrong 'you're.'
Or perhaps you have neglected a noun after 'jealous.'"

For most writers, they will need to learn grammar. Not "a little" grammar, but rather a lot actually. Most writers are wicked good at grammar even if they often miss their own mistakes. (It's got to do with a writer knowing what they meant and reading past their own errors.) When you read a lot and write a lot, you improve. But they at least need enough grammar knowhow to fulfill several key functions.

You need to be able to write most things fairly cleanly without an editor. Having an editor is like wearing your Sunday best, and you want to trot it out if you have a major project like a novel or a very prestigious article. But no one will say you're a good dresser if you wear your Sunday best on Sunday and the rest of the time wear the oversized t-shirt with the holes in it and the pit stains and the sweats with caked on cheese dip and the funky crotch smell when it goes over 72 degrees. There are times when it is impractical to hire an editor, but if you still want to be taken seriously as a writer, you better know at least enough grammar not to embarrass yourself.

Make the work you put out as good as you can. You're on your own for most writing you will do, and it's not always practical to hire an editor for everything. You want the skill set to be able to clean something up as good as you can without passing everything off. People will judge your writing based on your grammar. That's because most of humanity is petty and sucks, but it's just the price of doing business. If your grammar makes your writing hard to parse, it doesn't matter how brilliant the writing is. You can make a few mistakes (I sure do, don't I?) and most people will kindly point them out. (And a few will be total butt nuggets about it.) But if you start making too many mistakes, no one will take your ideas seriously. Creative writing is an art and a craft and a skill and if you neglect the skill, it almost doesn't matter how much of the others you have.

Submissions should be polished, not rough. So since this isn't cranky mail from someone anonymous, I'm going to try to be as nice as I can about this, but based on the questions you asked and some of the grammar mistakes in the questions themselves, I'm guessing that you have finished a manuscript and you've maybe been told that you need to clean up the grammar before you submit. You're thinking that an editor will do that for you. Unless you hire said editor, this will not happen. (Please feel absolutely free to do your own research if you don't believe me.) Many publications might have copy editors who will help you polish something, but you won't get accepted if you make large, glaring mistakes, and they won't bother trying to salvage something that will be more trouble than it is worth.

Most submission readers have a stack to read about as tall as they are, and won't even read past the first page if they see more than a couple of errors. When I worked at Transfer (the SFSU undergrad lit magazine) we considered it an insult if someone didn't care enough to send their best and we just tossed it. Round filed. Sent to shipping. Lost in the maelstrom. "Misplaced" (where we did the scare quotes with our fingers). Rejected with extreme prejudice.

An editor has to know what you meant.  Editors are amazing and wonderful and every time I work with one, I end up sounding way smarter than I actually am. But even when I can count on having one (which isn't often) we work together to clean up my writing. But they are trying to help me say what I want to say even better, and if they can't tell what that is, I just get my copy back with a bunch of question marks and expletives. If an editor can't figure out what you meant, they spend most of their time and energy just getting you to comprehensible.  What you want them to be doing is polishing you. You want to hand them tarnished silver not corrugated steel.

You want to be easy to edit. Unless you want to spend a lot of money on freelance editing, you want to be easy to edit. It makes editors happy to work with you, and it makes your writing much better when an editor is helping you be the best you can be and not proofreading your work like a 9th grade English teacher with an inflamed adrenal gland and a thick, red magic marker. It's good for your end product (the better what you hand them is, the better the finished product will be), and for your professional reputation.

Think of it more like this, Steven. Most editors are writers and so they are helping you by bringing their writing skills to your words, and every writer needs to know a fair chunk of grammar. Your roles are more overlapping than they are separate. The easier you can make an editor's job in the overlap part, the more they can do the work that is distinctly theirs. (You want them in there catching the fact that you made an honest mistake with a homophone error on page 47 and not trying to figure out what the verb is on the second line in page 2.)

What an editor does (or can do) goes far beyond catching your mistakes. They make you better.

Unless you just want a proofreader, an editor is so much more than just a grammar-check.

Most editors are going to mark things you didn't even know were mistakes, and you will get like three pens worth of red ink on a manuscript to work on, and lots of fantastic suggestions, but they can't do that wonderful job if they're stuck mucking through stuff you ought to know already.

Consider this pragmatically too. Even if your ideas are good, if you are going to take hundreds of hours to edit, a publisher won't consider you worth the investment.

The copyright thing is much more complicated, and the laws change depending on where you are. I encourage you (as I encourage any young writer) to spend an afternoon on Google. It's just the smart thing to do. You don't need to be a copyright lawyer to know the basics and way too many people are willing to tell you what they think they know so there's a lot of bad information out there (putting a © on your work is not the same as filing for copyright, for example). Here are some things that are useful for a first time writer to know:

• If you wrote it, and you didn't write it for someone else (like under contract), it's yours. Period. No one can publish it, say it was theirs, reproduce it for money, perform it, make money off of directly derivative works, or display it publicly unless you give them the right to. It might be tough to prove that it's yours if someone does do one of those things, but they are stealing from you and when you stand on their desiccated corpse and crush their skull under your boot, you'll be totally in the right.
• Holding copyright because you're the artist and filing for copyright are very different. As an artist, if you create something you automatically hold the copyright. As a not-copyright lawyer, you probably will never completely understand the latter.
• No publisher in their right minds will steal your story (or allow one of their employes to do so). Seriously, Steven, that's NOT gonna happen. If word got out a publisher had stolen a writer's story, they'd be scandalized beyond any money they ever made. You might even want to hold off putting the little © on your manuscript because some publishers will be insulted by the implication that they aren't absolute professionals.
• In today's world, anyone who would respect copyright won't steal your work. And almost everyone who would steal your work won't let a little thing like copyright stop them.
• In today's internet era, the question is less who holds a copyright and more who's going to do anything about it if there is infringement. (And there will be.) One of the reasons to publish with one of the big five is that their legal teams are comprised of Terminator robots with no souls. You can run, but you can't hide. They will find you. It's what they do. It's all they do.

Follow Writing About Writing

We've made some changes to our "Follow W.A.W." tab–including adding Tumblr as a way to follow us and the existence of our "brunch posts" that some media will post and some will not.

Interested in following Writing About Writing??

If you're trying to follow Writing About Writing it might actually be confusing to navigate all the different ways to do so. Not every social medium is updated in the same way. Some get just my big posts. Some get every post I make, no matter how major or minor. (Many days there are two posts but one of them is relatively minor.) Some media are privy to a cycle of "reruns" where once a day, I cycle through the popular posts of the past so that new folks can see some of the things they missed (and old fans can be reminded of treasured classics). I also write for other venues, and those who are following me as a writer, rather than JUST Writing About Writing, may prefer the media where I can share those other articles. Twitter gets ALL of these updates and may be a little too spammy for many readers.

97 of the Earth's coolest people can't be wrong!
The real "Join this site" button is at the
bottom of this (and every) page.

Follow Writing About Writing through Google (Blogger, Google Friend Connect). Google's Blogger allows you to assemble a collection of blogs you follow. Most people following the blog this way have their own blog through Blogger, but it's not necessary. (You only actually need a Google account, which many people have through gmail.)

Pros- Shows all new updates (minor and major). Updates in a timely manner. Helps me with my "membership numbers," which are a bellwether of how cool the blog is.
Cons- No reruns. No posts from other venues. Blogger usually takes a few hours to get the latest post up. Wordpress is the chic, happening blog place; Blogger is like the high school kids who eat lunch in the quad.

It's going to burn your FEED!!!
Wait...what?

R.S.S. Feed (Feedly, Feedburner) If you have an RSS reader, you may like to simply be updated by having your RSS feed updated with the text of my latest post. If you click on the Feedburner button at the bottom of the page, you can subscribe to Writing About Writing through a number of RSS readers including FeedDemon, Netvibes, My Yahoo, Shrook, Newsfire, RSSOwl and more.

Pros- Shows all new updates (major and minor). Updates instantly.
Cons-Updates instantly! (Usually before I've managed to find and fix the biggest typos and dumbshit errors I missed before I hit "Publish".) No reruns. No posts from other venues. Many RSS readers are JUST text, so you won't see the fabulously hilarious images. Also, f you get a little behind on your feed, it feels like the sword of Damocles.

In retrospect, I probably shouldn't punch in
the addys of all those Nigerian Princes.

E-Mail Notification At the bottom of the page there is an option to put your e-mail into a text field and subscribe to W.A.W. through e-mail notifications.  Every time I post an update, you will be sent an e-mail notification containing a link to the post. I've been told that there's even some preview text (the first 200 words or something).

Pros- Shows all new updates (minor and major). Updates right away.
Cons- No reruns. No posts from other venues. You already get ten billion e-mails a day.

G+ for the W.A.W. Page (The text there is also the link) This G+ page for Writing About Writing. Though I put an occasional image up (usually when I need to add text to an image to create a "You should be writing" macro), it is mostly there JUST for blog updates and reruns. If you want to get updates through G+, you should probably pick this page OR the one below, but not both. If you do both, it will appear in your feed as if every single link is being posted twice.

Pros- Show all new updates (minor and major). Includes reruns.
Cons- No posts from other venues. It's G+, so people will accuse you of working for Google.

G+ for Chris Brecheen (The text is also the link.) If I get added by a name I don't recognize in life, I put the name in a circle called "Author Updates." I post all my reruns and posts to other venues in this circle. I don't often use G+ otherwise, though occasionally I will have a public update that would also be seen by anyone in that circle.

Pros- Major posts, but not minor ones. Reruns. Posts from other venues. Posts right away. Not much other "noise."
Cons- Occasionally you'll see a public G+ post I write. Since I post all articles, reruns, and posts from other venues here, this can seem very "spammy." People will accuse you of being a Google shill because you're on G+.

Twitter (Chrisibrecheen) I don't use Twitter--not really. I don't really like it very much. I held in there for a while until all the retweets and replies became too much. So my tweets are ONLY cross posts of things I've written. Some people appreciate that it's a good place to get ONLY my updates; others find the "signal to noise" to be something that wouldn't make them want to follow me.

Pros- All posts. Reruns. Major posts. Minor posts. Posts from other venues. Posts right away. Not much other "noise."
Cons- I don't otherwise use Twitter. I also put ALL posts on Twitter even when I'm posting something different on Facebook (below) than on G+. That means sometimes Twitter has four or five links a day, and that can seem "spamish." Also misunderstandings in 140 character posts are a fact of life. Twitter pubic lice of the internet.

Facebook Page for Writing About Writing (Text is also the link) W.A.W.'s Facebook page is a whole different kettle of fish. It is, in fact, a thermo-kettle full of piranha. On my Facebook page, I actually post memes, macros, quotes, inspirational messages, videos, and try NOT TO POST TOO MUCH FROM MY BLOG. Most of the FB audience is there for the shenanigans, not the blog cross posting. Sometimes I skip posting "less popular" updates in favor of a "best of" rerun that will attract more of my FB audience. FB's algorithm blacks out posts, even to people who want to see it in order to encourage content providers to spend money promoting themselves.

Bitter.
So very bitter.

Pros- Lots of other fun stuff going on. Sticks to "best posts." Most reruns. Most posts from other venues.
Cons- Lots of other stuff going on. (Not a good place if you just want the updates or if you want all the updates.) Major posts. Not minor ones. FB algorithm prevents page followers from seeing every post so some W.A.W. posts will get lost. Skips less popular posts in favor of popular reruns. Not a good place to get all the updates. Enjoying anything on FB the requires a shower with steel wool and industrial cleanser. Facebook is the antichrist.

At this point I don't use any other forms of social media. Though my work will turn up on places like Reddit that has to do with other people, not me.

Tumblr (Text is also the link) I joined Tumblr after Facebook's latest round of content throttling that basically ensures that about one quarter of one percent of my Facebook followers see any given post. Tumblr doesn't try to decide what I want to see or what my followers want to see and it doesn't hold their eyeballs hostage to try and squeeze money out of me. Mostly, Tumblr isn't run by a bunch of greedy assholes with dollar signs in their eyes. I don't post as many macros on Tumblr as I do on Facebook because I don't have to post once an hour in order to be noticed once a day. However, Tumblr is a place where it's tough to compartmentalize, so you have to put up with some of my obnoxious "feminist crap."

Pros- Only main posts. Very few reruns (only the uberbest). Some funny macros. Feminist crap (if you like that stuff).
Cons- Only major posts. No "minor" posts. Occasional reruns. Feminist crap (if you don't like that kind of stuff).

Last Chance to Vote

This is your last chance to vote in the first semi-final round of the Best Science Fiction Series poll.

There are only a few more days to vote until our first round picks will be locked in and move on to the final round. On Sunday I will be posting the round two semi-final picks.

Our top three titles will go on to the final round.

On that day there will be tears and wailing and gnashing of teeth and some of you will look at the choices that have moved on to be in the final round and you will cry "How could THAT author make it?" Or "Why was THIS series passed over."

You alright. We learned it by watching you! (Or....something.)

On that day I will stand, unsympathetic with my arms crossed and I will look down on you with a hard face and say "Where were your votes?" Where was your vaunted concern when a simple shout out to a few friends could have made a difference. Where was this raging concern when a casual post on the right sub-Reddit would have turned the tides. In short, my friend, where were YOU when it mattered."

And in that cold moment, you will know that you stood at the crossroads, and you had the choice, and you let it go. You will know I am right.

So take a moment to scroll down to the long black poll on the lower left and give the series of your choice some love.

Oh and don't forget that those of you who voted when the poll first came out can probably vote again. Vote early. Vote often. It's the Polldaddy way!

Blogging From Kublacon!

The most fun you can have without MDMA fueled orgies!

I will be packing up on Friday and heading to Kublacon for a weekend of fun, games, and not being called a fake geek (even though I am one).

However, Blog insists that if I slack on offering new content every single day that there will be no hope of hitting the goal it dreamed up of not dropping below 1000 hits for the entire month of May, and it has insisted that I come up with an itinerary of posts that can be done from the hotel.

"But I like taking the weekend of convention's off," I said. "It's pretty much the closest thing I get to a vacation."

"Oh Chris," Blog said. "Dear, sweet Chris. Do you still not understand who controls whom in this relationship. We're not going to fall below a thousand page views because you wanted a vacation."

"I want the weekend off!" I said. I wanted it to be firm, but my voice cracked a little. "I'll post good reruns! They'll get hits. We'll make a thousand page views. Please don't make me–"

Blog quickly reached over and decapitated our latest picture-finding intern in one casual move.

"Oh I'm sorry, did I break your concentration?" It said. Then it held up the intern's head in its head and started shouting: "Now...if any of you sons of bitches got anything else to say, now's the fucking time."

"It's only me here," I said. I glanced at the intern's headless body.  "....now."

"I didn't want to mess up the Kill Bill quote," Blog said. "I trust you get the gist. Now go make me a postwich"

My relationship to this blog might not be...healthy.

So...for those of you with no plans this weekend, or those of you who just need something to do during the time slot when the shuffler denies you the game you really want to get into, I will be here. Whether I want to be or not.

• On Friday there will be a normal Mailbox even as I attempt to pack, clean every litter box, and try to leave with enough time to get my Friday night geek on. Babies don't make it hard to leave for things on time, do they?
• As I mentioned last Saturday, I did a panel about non-traditional publishing with Ace of Geeks that will be going up as their podcast on their website this Friday. Like most panels and interviews, I thought of addendum when we were on to the next question, or great things to say when the other guy was holding the microphone, or just generally thought of brilliant things to say two hours later (and that's why I'm a writer and not an orator). My Saturday post will be a timeline of additional thoughts (with time stamps) that you can read while listening to the podcast.
• Sun: A long overdue conversation with Ima Lister. I've been putting it off because he's our highest rated guest blogger, but I can't ignore it forever.
• Mon: I have My blog has a crazy ambition to try to do one of my "As a Writer" Convention Reports and to have it up right away. So even if it takes me until late afternoon or early evening, the hope is to get that posted–or at least the first part of one.

Brunch with Writing About Writing

More posts are coming to Writing About Writing! But you'll have to subscribe to get everything.

As part of some of the major overhaul of changes we're rolling out this year, W.A.W. will be adding a second post to many days, but the catch is that you have to subscribe or follow us on certain media in order to see them. We do so love keeping you on your toes. (And not just because it makes your calves look spectacular!)

The other catch is these posts are going to be on the goofy side. They might not be everyone's kink cup of tea.

There is actually a sizable–and growing–backlog of posts to be written here at Writing About Writing.

Seriously, I've had to start stacking them in the corners of the spare bedroom of my brain behind all the Mystery Science Theater quotes I've memorized and the Glen A. Larson shows I watched too much of as a kid.

Can we pause just a moment on that note and talk? Who? The HELL? Thinks Gil Gerard is good casting for the sexiest man in the galaxy? (Oh he's better looking than I am, to be sure. But sexiest man in the galaxy?) How did he get that role? And the slave auction episode with the bidding war for topless Gil. Those women all deserve Emmys for not laughing their heads off.

We've got meta posts about what directions the blog is going in, short posts of things like questions we've fielded on our Facebook page, random flotsam and jetsam, menu updates, super basics, potpourri posts, Pointer Sister posts, commercials for upcoming goodness, plot arc posts that answer questions you are all on the edge of your seat about like which one of Writing About Writing's Staff is responsible for posting the Evil Mystery Blogger posts. (You claim to not really be on the edge of your seat, but you can't fool me.) Speaking of our staff page, it might be nice to get those member bios that most of the staff has taken like a year to get to me. Clearly this is because they are lazy assholes. Or it might possibly be because I pay them a few cents a day and keep them locked up inside a fortified compound. Either way it is completely unacceptable.

There's even a post here about a velociraptor with an eye laser.

Why not just post this stuff? Especially if it's lower key and I've been whining more than the baby I take care of about time management troubles lately? Wouldn't posting this, instead of some thirty item list on how to be miserable, help me to cloister my valuable "Hookers and Blow" time that is so hard to come by lately.

This is a tragic story of ambition vs. pragmatism, so do not even attempt to contain your tears. Because of Blog's obsession with page views he has been riding me like a drive by (what does that even mean?) to put up popular content so that the page views go up. This latest madness about not dropping below 1000 hits all May long has nearly killed me. He doesn't want to see me coasting through a day with nothing but a post relaying a conversation about cheese. Not when there are page views to be had and that sort of shenanigans doesn't tend to perform particularly well.

But that's the sort of shenanigans I really enjoy as a writer, so many the tearful days have been spent telling Blog what I wanted to write and having it look at me with tender eyes and say, "Is that going to get me the hits I so richly deserve? I don't think so. So get back in there and write me a proper entry. Because you are my butt monkey. And I am your master. And Chris....?"

I turn and look.

Blog's voice goes down an octave and slithers out as its tender eyes go granite hard. "Don't ever forget that!" it says.

I scuttle off to write.

It works the other way too. I have a lot of good writing content planned, but it's not always the most traffic heavy stuff. Basics, craft essays, things that get good hits over time due to search engines and being useful but that aren't going to get a lot a page views the same day they're posted. Blog makes me put those away in favor of some funny jazz hands.

"This is educational," it says. "It will never do."

"Please..." I say. "It's so useful to young writers. It will help them. In the long run, this article will do well!"

"No no no," Blog says, ripping open its third sleeve of Oreos for the day.  "I only have four hours to make another three hundred page views. Do another one of those Fortune Cookie things. Those are good. More jokes though."

I slink off.

So the only way to make Blog and me happy is that some days I'll be writing two posts. It won't be every day, but there may often be a second post.

• These "less critical" posts will go up first. Usually late morning or very early afternoon. The "main" post won't be too far behind.
• I'm not going to promote my "brunch" posts on every social media I currently post. If you are interested in them, you will need to subscribe to W.A.W. through blogger, email notifications, or a feed OR follow me on G+ or twitter (chrisibrecheen). All the other places I post will only get the main post.
• That means that G+ and Twitter will be getting FOUR posts some days. One rerun, one "brunch" post, one "main" post, and possibly a call to vote in whatever the ongoing poll is. If that ends up being too spammy for some of you, I understand.

No Post??? Unless You Count THIS!

Like you could resist!

So this little guy needed a DOUBLE helping of emergency watching today.  (In addition to the regular five hours.) Once because The Brain desperately needed to power down her central processors after a long night of computing actuary tables, and then again because Uberdude got called by our sister crime fighting league in New Delhi and had to spend over an hour on a conference call discussing the villain GPS tracking software that they were trying to debug.

Anyway it was about ten hours of babysitting him while he went around contradicting everything with his psychic powers. He's also working on two new powers–one which might be useful and one that is....um....well probably a little less so. He is now capable of producing ten gallons of drool per day. If you look closely at the picture, you can see him whipping up a batch right when I took it. I'm not sure how that's going to help him fight crime, but maybe he can make floors slippery when criminals run by or something. But the one that might come in handy is that he can now emit a sonic scream that can shatter glass, hard plastic, and spinal columns (trust me on that last one--mine is now made of a titanium replacement that Doctor Sawbones was able to emergency install). He's also about three decibels from shattering my will to live.

Regardless, even though what was to be today's post is written, my late night ohfuckthisislate posts rarely get many page views, and since this one will be vaguely, kind of, sort of, somewhat important, I'll post it tomorrow instead, and force you all to bask in the cuteness that are his little tiny overalls instead.

Ohmygodtinyoveralls!!!