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My drug of choice is writing––writing, art, reading, inspiration, books, creativity, process, craft, blogging, grammar, linguistics, and did I mention writing?

Friday, February 13, 2015

Questions Needed

Do you have a question about writing (or maybe art [including other art forms], reading, inspiration, books, creativity, process, craft, blogging, grammar, linguistics, and yes even possibly social justice, especially as it pertains to those things)?  

Did I maybe not answer your question completely, and you want to follow up?

Have you sent me a question and I never answered it? (Because my brain is a desolate wasteland with oases of incredibly dense eclectic nonsense in which an old e-mail can easily go missing for years.)

Are you a question, and you need a place to stay where you will be welcomed and not judged, and maybe even find that special answer you've been looking for all your life?

Something something something somatic satiation of the word "question"?

We're about to ramp up to two mailboxes a week (most weeks) here at Writing About Writing. Your questions inspire me to write about topics I've been thinking about and often been meaning to write about but just haven't gotten to the sit-down-and-word point. They are inspiring and stimulating, and they tend to do consistently better than most of my other posts.

I have a LOT of questions in the hopper right now and at the rate I'm going they build up faster than they go away. However, if I go up to two mailboxes a week, it won't be very long until I'm OUT of questions in the hopper. And that's when I start cannibalizing Facebook comments and random conversations. Then I start walking down the street and accosting innocent people for questions: "I SAID ASK ME SOMETHING ABOUT LINGUISTICS!" It's all bad.

That's where you come in. Save random people on the Oakland streets from being accosted and forced to come up with questions about craft and process by sending me your questions!

Send your questions to chris.brecheen@gmail.com and I will answer them (if they are at least peripherally about one of the topics above....or possibly the answer would be hilarious). I will include only your first name unless you request your full name, a pseudonym, or total anonymity.

Thursday, February 12, 2015

Nominations And Seconds Needed: Best Heroine

Our "Best heroine poll needs your nominations, but more than anything we need more of the nominated heroines to be seconded. Nothing makes it to the poll without a second, and right now, there are only a few.

In a few days I'm going to gather up all the nominations for our February1 poll.  However we're in bad need of nominations and ESPECIALLY seconds if we are to have a robust poll instead of just a couple of names. It's all up to you.

Please please please go to the original post to make a nomination, so that when I compile the poll, everything is all in one place. Otherwise I will think you hate me. 

And I might* cry.

*He totally will
   -Evil Chris

Wednesday, February 11, 2015

2014's Best Posts (By Year and Month)


Once again here are the top ten posts for 2014. 


Coming Out as Feminist Let's stop pretending, shall we?
20 Shritstorm Narratives and What's Wrong With Them
A Writer Goes to Burning Man A major revision of my article from 2012
On Social Media and Social Justice A strangely popular "jazz hands" post.
No Apologies: A Defense of Why Speculative Fiction Needs No Defense Revised from 2012
An Open Letter to Lynn Shepherd Remember that woman who told JK Rowling not to write?
Elliot Rodger and The MRA/PUA On Writing
Word Crimes Who exactly was Weird Al trolling with this song?
17 Rules of Writing I might have missed a few....or made up a few. Either way.
How Could You Pick E-Pub? How COULD you? (Mailbox) Hater's gonna hate.

Honorable Mention

That Feminist Crap/Social Justice Bard A menu that would have come in 3rd if it were a post.
Why is the Publishing Industry so Whitewashed? (Mailbox) Missed the top ten by 5 hits.

However, I also compiled the list of top three links for each month of 2014, all of which are now in The Best of W.A.W. (where you can also find the best of 2013 and 2012., and which is always in the tabs at the top of Writing About Writing.)

January
Happy Second Birthday Writing About Writing
You Don't Really Have To Write. Really. (Part 6)
Derailed!

February
Question: Do You Really Have to Write Every Day to Be A Writer (F.A.Q.)
A Pound of Flesh
The Mailbox: Do I Have What it Takes?

March
The Pros and Cons of W.A.W.'s Social Media
Parting Clouds
Let Writing Terrify You (Mailbox)

April
30 Ways For Writers to Be (And Stay) Miserable (Part 1)
The Mailbox: Text to Speech Software (And Season 2)
Post Delayed Because Baby

May
Sunday Rerun Day
Copyright and Editing (Mailbox)
The Mailbox: Talent

June
The Mailbox: Is Dead Poets Society a Shitty Movie or What?
My Life Just Got a Little More Complicated
Introducing O.G.

July
Opting Out: My Dubious Future in Traditional Publishing
The Mailbox: Self Doubt
Traditional Publishing Questions (Mailbox)

August
Personal Attax
The REALLY Hateful Hate Mail
Attack of the Strawmen (Mailbox)

September
The 17 Rules of Writing 
Pass/Agg Memo to Other Artists
Why Others' Stories Matter 

October
Pass/Agg Memorandum to Other Artists
The Mailbox: What's Your Process 
Self Reflection Sucks (Part 1) 

November
What is Avant Garde? (Mailbox)
I Am The Night....Or Something
Writing Angry and Capes (Mailbox)

December
So You Want to Start Your Own Blog (Part 2)
How Do I Describe Things? (Mailbox)
The Coming Week (Or so)

Tuesday, February 10, 2015

State of the Blogyion Address (Personal)

Readers, Patrons, Muses, my fellow Americans, readers around the world, and everyone who accidentally clicked a link on social media and wound up here by mistake:

We are fifteen years into this new century. Fifteen years that dawned with the Budweiser "Wasssup" commercial; where I saw two long and stressful attempts to manage restaurants; that saw vicious feedback send me back to the drawing board to confront whether or not I really wanted to be a writer, and an eight year struggle to get a four year degree. It has been, and still is, a hard time for my creative endeavors.

But tonight, we turn the page. Or at least click on the link to a new URL.

Writing About Writing began three years ago: the culmination of two ideas germinating like seeds. One, that I wanted to write and even perhaps pay some bills with it, and that no fetishization of having a published novel or being a "real" writer would make me as happy as being paid to do that thing I love. And two, that there was massive tectonic upheaval within the writing world that was causing non-traditional publishing to eclipse the more traditional routes. Since then, that view has evolved even further to include opting out of ever really pursuing a traditional publishing route.

In the last year I have discovered the joy of raising a tiny human, even though it has been a sharknado on my writing productivity. From the maddening inability to set up a simple writing regimen that accounts for sleep and reading to the loss of anything resembling control over the mess in the house, every moment has been one of triage and improvisation. I've learned to type furiously during the ten minutes that Legos distract him, and whole chapters and articles have come blasting out of me during an hour's nap. This is a useful skill, but it was not easily won.

I'm the blessing; in case you were wondering.
It was a year with a spectacular blessing, but also one with many trials and tribulations. A dear friend got cancer, and I went to be by her side, trying not to let it show that behind my skull I was screaming. There were a lot of rough adjustments around The Contrarian with his parents and a schedule that can't always be about fighting crime anymore. They tried to keep up the good fight but some of the area in west Oakland just had to be farmed out to the Emeryville comitatus. Also, I turned forty had my 10th anniversary of being thirty and now I'm officially creepy.

It's been rough.

But as I find my feet with this kid thing, forage compromises with mom, dad, and even friends, and learn to eke more and more productivity out of less and less time, the future begins to shape up in a way that will fulfill the promise of this blog and be totally inspirational and shit.


Since I'm a huge fan of goals (especially well designed, well considered goals) I want to process my goals before I get too much into year four, and I thought for people who wonder how that happens might like to see my process. While goals like subscribers and page views are technically not fulfilling the second S of "SMARTS" goals, I find that I can influence them with some predictability when I'm doing all the right things that I can control.

My goals from year three were a chorus of "technical" successes. I hit every goal (save one), but I didn't really nail any.

  • My readership is up from the year before (not including the viral phenomenon of Creepy Guy) I hit my low end goal of averaging 1000 hits a day; however, I never quite made it to a 50k month.
  • My follower/subscriber growth on everything but Facebook were lethargic. I have about 500 followers across various platforms (or social media where I share nothing but writing updates). That's basically up from 400 and was the bare minimum I was hoping for.  My stretch goal was 750, and I didn't come anywhere close to that amount. 
  • I managed to keep blogging, every day, despite a tiny human coming on the scene, but he did disrupt my flow pretty spectacularly. There were not enough hard hitting articles and an awful lot of jazz hands.
  • I wrote more fiction, but averaged only a post a month–the bare minimum I was going for. And the last couple of months have been dragging that "average" down.
  • I successfully wrote for the two other blogs, but my writing was sporadic and unreliable. 
  • I found a balance to insulate my private Facebook life from my public persona, but I'm still having some trouble not spending too much time on social media.
  • I failed at one thing. I meant to write more reviews of products and awesome lesser-known books, but the time/energy commitment for even a single such post turned out to be 

These are my "Fresh to Death" goals for the coming year.
  • I've bumped up to about 1300-1500 page views a day in the past month or so with the occasional dip down to the just-over-1000 level. I don't know if that's artificial or the new baseline, but I'm going to cross my fingers. I would like to reach 50,000 a month by the end of the year. Not once as a fluke but consistently. 2000 views a day (about 60k a month) will be my stretch goal.
  • Cleaning up an old post, menu, or tab at least every week.
  • Resuming Season 2 with some sort of plot post at least once a week.
  • 750-1000 followers. (Or 250-500 more across all social media)
  • Predictable "meaty" entries twice a week. (Mon and Fri) and the stretch goal of another one on Tuesday.
  • Writing for Ace of Geeks and Grounded Parents at least once a month each. Stretch goal of a bi-weekly switch off.
  • Fiction twice a month. (This one's going to be really tough, so there is no flex goal. I may have an anti-flex goal of successfully getting one fiction post a month up, but I really hope to make this one.)
  • Facebook time is REALLY hard to measure and put hardcap limits on, but I am absolutely HEMORRHAGING time on that social media, and I really need to stop.
  • One review each month. Flex goal of one Twizzlefizzlepop book review and one product review each month.

Monday, February 9, 2015

Quickies (Mailbox)


How much traffic does Creepy Guy get? Do I do any panels or conventions? How quickly can you expect to make money blogging?  How do I choose which project to work on? What do you think of fan fiction?

[Remember, keep sending in your questions to chris.brecheen@gmail.com with the subject line "W.A.W. Mailbox" and I will answer each Friday.  I will use your first name ONLY unless you tell me explicitly that you'd like me to use your full name or you would prefer to remain anonymous.  My comment policy also may mean one of your comments ends up in the mailbox. I sometimes use FB comments as blog fodder too.]   

In the interest of full disclosure, my seventy and eighty hour weeks (about 40 hours of househusband, teaching and then writing) have not lightened in over a month, so today I've decided to answer several much shorter questions and then dive into the kitchen with a football helmet on my head and a baby on my back.

Stephen asks:

How much traffic does your Creepy Guy article bring you these days?

My reply:

My analytics say that Creepy Guy was 929 page views in the last thirty days. That's out of 46,600 and change. So without doing the slightest bit of math. roughly 1/50th my traffic. Overall it is 297,000 or a little over a quarter. I definitely owe a lot to that article, but I get traffic from other places too, especially these days.


Liz asks:

Do you do any panels or conventions? Is there a way for a fan to meet you, and maybe get an autograph?

My reply: 

Uh.....

Um....

~flusterstammer~

Are you SERIOUS???

No one's ever really wanted to meet me. I'm not sure how to handle this. I need an oxygen mask and it might take plastic surgery to get this smile off my face. I'll try not to smear Nutella all over my body and shriek like the body snatcher guys, but this is a bit strange. You know I'm just a two bit blogger, and not particularly interesting in person, right? I don't even have a book I could sign. I have a friend who says he hopes he can be there when I get solicited for my first autograph from a stranger, but I assumed that was years off if ever.  [ETA Narrator's voice: "It wasn't."]

I go to a couple of gaming conventions here in the bay area, but I go to them as a guest. I'm not on a panel or anything. I buy a ticket and nerd out as hard as my limited social batteries will allow. While neither is particularly difficult to figure out (both are named in other places on this blog), it's not really a function I attend in a writer capacity. I wouldn't run screaming from someone I'd never met or anything, but unless you want to play in a Battlestar Galactica LARP, there wouldn't be much hanging out involved.

Anonymous asks: 

How quickly can I expect to make money blogging?

My reply:

Right away!

That's one of the beauties of non-traditional publishing. You don't have to work for years before you see your first paycheck. However, you won't be making a LOT of money right away, you will be making a laughable shit pittance. My first year I made $100. My second year I made $500. This year I made about $2500 (which works out to about $2/hr for anyone who thinks I've hit the big time.) In traditional publishing, you work for years to publish your first book and if your book is good and with a little luck, you maybe get a 10k advance on the next one (that's a pretty good new-author contract with a big five publisher).

Here's hoping my growth by a factor of five continues because I'm all about making 1.5 million in 2018.

Emily asks: 
A brilliant bit from Commitstrip.com

How do you choose which project to work on?

My reply: 

Me personally? Right now, it's a fevered attempt to slam a blog post in the critical seconds between poopy diapers and post apocalyptic mountains of dishes and if (big if) I have a little time left over that isn't steam-pouring-from-my-ears venting of desperately needed alone time, I twiddle on one of my fiction projects I have had on the back burner for years. One of the main goals for Blog's fourth year is to carve out more time for non-blog writing. Even if I have to hire a professional housekeeper twice a week.

As far as advice I could offer to others, I would tell them the next project you work on should be the next project you are absolutely ready to FINISH.

Tinkering with an idea just to see how it starts to shape up is something all creatives do, and sometimes those idea seeds flower into the most brilliant pieces of all, but really sinking your teeth into a project should involve a commitment to see it to its completion–whatever that means for the artist.

Otherwise, you just end up with a bunch of half done projects that you "weren't really that into anyway." If you tell yourself at the outset. "No, fuck you, self. This one I'm going to fucking finish!" you're more likely to get it done.


Lou asks:

What do you think of fan fiction?

My reply: 

Looks like I'm going to piss off some lit snobs today, Lou. Ah well. It's a good day for it. The sun is out. The birds are singing. And I have a new package of Tim Tams with caramel in the center.

There are some valid criticisms that could be raised about fanfic. The quality of the prose is often a bit low, even for self-published work, to say nothing of a typical traditionally published book. The writer has borrowed characters and worlds instead of creating their own. Some authors like Anne Rice and G.R.R. Martin strongly dislike their worlds being fan-fictionalized and it's kind of disrespectful to do it anyway, especially when the author is still working on a narrative arc and fan fic writers are jumping the gun on the end.

However, I have to say that fanfic snobbery is one of the most confusing bits of literary disdain I encounter regularly. (And I encounter a lot.) It makes less sense than the unpublished snots who write me hate mail to inform me that even though I'm getting paid and read by thousands, I'm not a real writer. I really don't think people who sneer at fanfic (particularly unpublished writers) have thought this one through–even those bestselling authors who are so monolithic they seem to have the privilege of insulting those who are clearly their most loyal and rabid fans, and who are basically out there toiling for free to write commercials for their canon.

Look.....here you have a group who writes for the love of the story and for no other reason. They write for their own enjoyment. Without any thought of riches or fame, they create something strictly for other people to enjoy. Many of them develop the skills they need not only in craft but in process, creativity, voice, receiving and incorporating criticism, pacing, and revision which they might leverage against a future career but will likely simply use to become better at doing more of what they love. They spend hours, days, years working hard simply for the love of writing, the love of story. There's something incredibly unsung in that level of artistic integrity.

I'm not one of those people who thinks money sullies an artist. In fact, I told most of those people thank you and walked away the day I moved my tassel to the other side. But I also know that there are (many) quicker ways to make a buck than by writing. You could sell Amway door to door and make more money than by writing. So you better love it for its own sake first. And fan fic writers do.

In many ways fanfic writers are the most pure expression of what creative writing really should be about. They write because they love it and they write for the enjoyment of others. They find stories so compelling that they do what humans have done since we raised our upper forebrains and have continued the story...added to it...told it again in different ways, and even taken the characters for a walk in their own adventures. Fan fic has been around since the dawn of time. We used to call it "oral tradition," but even since written language, people have told stories of their favorite characters.

Modern fan fic writers have existed humbly in a world where you can own a copyright and make money off of sales, and sue people for infringement. They have thrived because you can't own the places that another human imagination runs with an idea. Kindle Worlds might change this a little for a few of the best fanfic writers working in legal canons, but for most writers, it will always be about the writing.

I think there's a lot of ways in which that sort of pure artistic integrity is keeping writers honest. Fan fic authors remind us why we started applying pigment to cave walls in the first place. Why we started telling stories. It's not about money or fans or groupies. It's because to NOT create...that is what kills our humanity.

Sunday, February 8, 2015

Whipping Up Some Grounded Parents

I'm spending my blog writing time today working on an article for Grounded Parents. It will probably come out some time next week.

Remember if you want to get my Grounded Parent articles when they come out, you should follow me on one of the social media I've set up as Chris Brecheen the author (rather than for this blog specifically).

In the meantime, allow me to emcee this past article from G.P.: Enter The Houseshuband. which talks about how much work I do around the house for my family.

I thought it appropriate given that the last month or so I've averaged about fifty hours of work each week before I ever sat down and wrote so much as a word. It sometimes relates directly to the amount of Jazz hands we produce here.

Friday, February 6, 2015

You Just Got "Literally" Burned

Hi everyone. Joy here. Chris put in a 45 hour week on househusbandry and teaching this week (that's more than most people before he even sat down and started writing), so in the interest of his trying to put quality over quantity, he's letting me tag in today.

Besides, Leela has promised to start writing if my sisters and I get more post time. So maybe we'll see some bad advice getting its ass kicked soon.

If Chris will take a damned day off once in a while to get a better article up the next day, the end result will be more posts from me and my sisters and Leela Bruce.

So enjoy this poignant story about a teacher who insists that students know the difference between "literally" and "figuratively."